7 Signs Your’e A Rebound – Hughes it or Lose it?

Rebound (2005 film)
Rebound (2005 film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Your friends warn you that your new relationship might be a rebound, as your dateā€™s last relationship didnā€™t end all that long ago. Here are a few things to look for if you suspect you might be a rebound.

 

Bitterness

 

Everyone has baggage. But if your date is known to mutter, ā€œAll girls are gold diggers,ā€ or ā€œMost guys are dogs,ā€ he/she still has some broken-heart healing to do before embarking on a new relationship adventure. Even if the bitterness seems directly aimed at the ex and not at the exā€™s gender in general, thereā€™s still a negative energy there that will only stall a new romance before it takes off.

 

Eagerness

 

If you get the sense that your date is just happy to be dating someone ā€” anyone, really ā€” and not you in particular, donā€™t ignore that red flag. Even without ill intentions, your date could be using you to help soothe the sting of a breakup rather than taking the time to really get to know you and fall for you for the right reasons. These relationships are often lonely and ultimately doomed.

 

The ā€œExā€ Talk

 

He talks about his ex all the time. He mentions that you look like her, or that your mannerisms or interests remind him of her. He takes you places his once took his ex ā€” and tells you so. If heā€™s still preoccupied with someone else, heā€™s not ready to fully move on.

 

The ā€œExā€ Remains

 

Even though the breakup was clearly recent, she says sheā€™s still friends with her ex. Sure enough, Facebook confirms theyā€™re still in contact ā€” or worse, still ā€œin a relationship.ā€ Picture frames at her place have yet to be emptied of ā€œhappier timesā€ memories. She still wears his sweater and doesnā€™t seem to acknowledge that itā€™s date-inappropriate. If the recent ex is still an active part of your dateā€™s daily life, youā€™re likely a rebound.

 

Physical, Not Emotional

 

If youā€™re feeling like thereā€™s too much emphasis on your physical relationship, there probably is. A tell-tale sign of a rebound relationship is one thatā€™s very physical, with little emotional substance. If your new love interest consistently steers conversations away from vulnerability or puts up a wall every time you try to dig deeper emotionally, he/she isnā€™t ready for anything serious.

 

Friends Are Surprised Heā€™s Dating Again

 

If his friends (or yours) are raising their eyebrows at the speed with which he started dating again post-breakup, the new relationship might be poorly timed. Sometimes itā€™s wise to trust the red flagsĀ coming fromĀ others.

 

Commitment-phobic

 

If your date canā€™t make a single relationship decision ā€” or even a commitment for next Friday night ā€” he/she is likely still adjusting to a life of singleness. She might not be used to operating independently. He might be ā€œkeeping his options openā€ because he felt he ā€œsettledā€ last time. A rebound relationship is often an undefined one, with little security or commitment offered from the recently single one.

 

Courtesy of Eharmony

 

 

 

Paying College Athletes

Photo credit: Jay Davis Graham Harrell. From T...
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Great Article From The Sport Digest

Should Student-Athletes Get Paid?

Several issues are involved in the heated debate on whether student-athletes should be paid by their institutions for their athletic services. Some believe that student-athletes receive more than enough compensation through their awarded scholarships. Others believe that student-athletes should be rewarded for hard work and the revenue they bring to their colleges and universities. To further the debate, the authors would like to review a few comments from both proponents and opponents of pay for collegiate student-athletes, to help readers gain a better understanding.

Those who think student-athletes should not be paid provide several arguments. Their primary concern is that, once student-athletes start receiving benefits in monetary form, they will no longer be amateur athletes: When monetary rewards are given, the athlete is then a professional. In addition, cash payments could also impose unsportsmanlike conduct among players and university sport programs. When athletes accept scholarships, they are provided tuition, books, meals, housing, and sometimes graduate assistantships. At some colleges and universities, such support may reach a value of $200,000 over a four-year period. Student-athletes may also receive special treatment when it comes to academic issues, for example priority scheduling, tutoring assistance, and excused absences. Arenā€™t student-athletes, then, well-compensated already?

Sport enthusiasts favoring the idea of paying student-athletes hold a whole different perspective, however. They argue that student-athletes should be paid, in light of the huge revenues they have generated for the colleges and universities. They also believe that paying student-athletes would alleviate problems related to illegal payments and point shaving. Paying student-athletes would provide athletes an incentive to stay in school and complete their degree programs, instead of leaving early for the professional leagues.

Many claim that college athletes are being exploited by their schools, which make millions of dollars off of intercollegiate athletics while student-athletes at times are not able to afford dining, entertainment, and even some educational expenses. While some people assume that a scholarship award should end any financial trouble a student-athlete may have, this is an inaccurate assumption. Furthermore, institutionsā€™ athletic scholarships in reality are not usually plentiful enough to support entire teams. We examined such scholarships available at our institution, and it is clear that most scholarships arenā€™t ā€œfull rides.ā€ They fail to cover a lot of the expenses incurred throughout four years of college. In addition, there is no guarantee that an annual athletic scholarship will be renewed for every returning student-athlete.

In 2000, the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) approved student-athletesā€™ employment in jobs paying up to $2,000 during a school year; the income can address educational expenses. But other than in summertime, student-athletes have no extra time for work in addition to practice, training, and classes. Although the NCAA constitution states that, ā€œstudent-athletes shall be amateurs ā€¦ and should be protected from exploitation by professional and commercial enterprises,ā€ it seems colleges and universities are the entity that exploits their own student-athletes (Martin, 2002).

A survey (n = 458) on college studentsā€™ perceptions about payment of collegiate athletes indicated that students supported the idea of paid athletes. The survey also suggested that cash payments should come from athletic departments, universitiesā€™ general funds, shoe and television contracts, and even increased tuition. Studentsā€™ willingness to pay their teamsā€™ athletes through tuition increases clearly demonstrates that the student body values the athletic programs of a university highly (Schneider, 2001).

Both sides in this debate have made very compelling arguments to support their view. We feel that colleges and universities have offered a lot of compensation and benefits to their student-athletes, for example scholarships and a great learning experience. But are these enough? Some say yes, and some say no. If paying student-athletes is not an option, we wonder how walk-on athletesā€™ status can be justified. Since no scholarship is offered to walk-on athletes, they put in the same amount of time and effort as scholarship athletes and receive no compensation for it. Doesnā€™t their input deserve something?

We do not believe that colleges and universities are exploiting athletes. However, since student-athletes help generate millions of dollars for their schools, there must be some programs that could be implemented to cover more of student-athletesā€™ educational and living expenses. One of these plans is allowing students to accept endorsements. Another way to resolve the issue would be having professional sport leagues work with colleges and universities to offer athletes incentives to graduate before becoming professional athletes.

A college or universityā€™s primary objective is to provide its students with a quality education that prepares them to function in the world as opposed to in college. In our opinion, the universities have a moral responsibility to collaborate with the sport industry and professional sport leagues to create a system that supports the needs of their studentsā€™ academic and career development. Perhaps the fundamental question here is not whether student-athletes deserve compensation. The challenge is, could institutions gather enough revenues to compensate student-athletes fairly and objectively for their services?

References

Submitted by: Stephanie Sturgill, Candidate for B.A. in Physical Education, Morehead State University, Dr. Steve Chen, Assistant Professor of Sport Management, Morehead State University

Martin, M. (2002, August 20). ā€œNCAA limitations placed upon scholarship allocation hurt sports.ā€ The Lantern. Retrieved April 21, 2008, from http://media.www.thelantern.com/media/storage/paper333/news/2002/08/20/Sports/Ncaa-Limitations.Placed.Upon.Scholarship.Allocation.Hurt.Sports-261460-page2.shtml

Schneider, R. G. (2001). College studentsā€™ perceptions on the payment of intercollegiate student-athletes: Statistical data included. College Student Journal, Retrieved April 12, 2008, from http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mim0FCR/is235/ai77399630/pg_6

The Dale Carnegie Course

As some of you may or may not know, I no longer sell rides… I IMPACT LIVES.

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10 Tips to Get Better Sleep

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Is it my caffeine intake? Food? Frazier wants to make it easier to get a good night’s sleep every night with these simple steps.

  1. Cut caffeine. Simply put, caffeine can keep you awake. It can stay in your body longer than you might think ā€“ the effects of caffeine can take as long as eight hours to wear off. So if you drink a cup of coffee in the afternoon and are still tossing at night, caffeine might be the reason. Cutting out caffeine at least four to six hours before bedtime can help you fall asleep easier.
  2. Avoid alcohol as a sleep aid. Alcohol may initially help you fall asleep, but it also causes disturbances in sleep resulting in less restful sleep. An alcohol drink before bedtime may make it more likely that you will wake up during the night.
  3. Relax before bedtime. Stress not only makes you miserable, it wreaks havoc on your sleep. Develop some kind of pre-sleep ritual to break the connection between all the day’s stress and bedtime. These rituals can be as short as 10 minutes or as long as an hour.

Some people find relief in making a list of all the stressors of the day, along with a plan to deal with them this can act as “closure” to the day. Combining this with a period of relaxation perhaps by reading something light, meditating, aromatherapy, light stretching, or taking a hot bath can also help you get better sleep. And don’t look at the clock! That “tick-tock” will just tick you off.

  1. Exercise at the right time for you. Regular exercise can help you get a good night’s sleep. The timing and intensity of exercise seems to play a key role in its effects on sleep. If you are the type of person who gets energized or becomes more alert after exercise, it may be best not to exercise in the evening. Regular exercise in the morning even can help relieve insomnia, according to a study.
  2. Keep your bedroom quiet, dark, and comfortable. For many people, even the slightest noise or light can disturb sleep like the purring of a cat or the light from your laptop or TV. Use earplugs, window blinds or curtains, and an electric blanket or air conditioner everything possible to create an ideal sleep environment. And don’t use the overhead light if you need to get up at night; use a small night-light instead. Ideal room temperatures for sleeping are between 68 and 72 degrees Fahrenheit. Temperatures above 75 or below about 54 can disrupt sleep.
  3. Eat right, sleep tight. Try not to go to bed hungry, but avoid heavy meals before bedtime. An over-full belly can keep you up. Some foods can help, though. Milk contains tryptophan, which is a sleep-promoting substance. Other foods that may help promote sleep include tuna, halibut, pumpkin, artichokes, avocados, almonds, eggs, bok choy, peaches, walnuts, apricots, oats, asparagus, potatoes, buckwheat, and bananas.

Also, try not to drink fluids after 8 p.m. This can keep you from having to get up to use the bathroom during the night.

  1. Restrict nicotine. Having a smoke before bed — although it feels relaxing actually puts a stimulant into your bloodstream. The effects of nicotine are similar to those of caffeine. Nicotine can keep you up and awaken you at night. It should be avoided particularly near bedtime and if you wake up in the middle of the night.
  2. Avoid napping. Napping can only make matters worse if you usually have problems falling asleep. If you do nap, keep it short. A brief 15-20-minute snooze about eight hours after you get up in the morning can actually be rejuvenating.
  3. Keep pets off the bed. Does your pet sleep with you? This, too, may cause you to awaken during the night, either from allergies or pet movements. Fido and Fluffy might be better off on the floor than on your sheets.
  4. Avoid watching TV, eating, and discussing emotional issues in bed.The bed should be used for sleep and sex only. If not, you can end up associating the bed with distracting activities that could make it difficult for you to fall asleep.

-From webmd

 

 

2010 in review

The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how THE FRAZIERHUGHES.COM blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:

Healthy blog!

The Blog-Health-o-Meterā„¢ reads This blog is on fire!.

Crunchy numbers

Featured image

A Boeing 747-400 passenger jet can hold 416 passengers. This blog was viewed about 11,000 times in 2010. That’s about 26 full 747s.

In 2010, there were 293 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 348 posts. There were 534 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 177mb. That’s about 1 pictures per day.

The busiest day of the year was April 27th with 127 views. The most popular post that day was HUGHES NEWS “The Blue Ridge Marathon Experience” Likes/Dislikes.

Where did they come from?

The top referring sites in 2010 were facebook.com, mp3000.net, airmp3.net, mp3-center.org, and mp3raid.com.

Some visitors came searching, mostly for frazier hughes, become a fan, frazierhughes.com, how to find a date on facebook, and find a date on facebook.

Attractions in 2010

These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.

1

HUGHES NEWS “The Blue Ridge Marathon Experience” Likes/Dislikes April 2010
1 comment

2

Dancing June 2009
7 comments

3

I Sell Cars. June 2009

4

About June 2009

5

My Agent In Roanoke September 2009

Great Quote

Mark Twain photo portrait.
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Twenty years from now….

You will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

ā€“ Mark Twain

My Most Recent Sale

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She bought a 2007 Camry, check out this 1986 Model!

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